Sophomore Year
Between the ages of 23-27 things change. This is officially your sophomore year. The club scene just doesn’t mean what it used to (or anything at all). You actually would like to meet a nice young man that would like to spend real quality time with you – not just sleep with you. You are ready for things to be different. You may still be dating the guy you met in college and would like to marry him – but he still doesn’t seem quite ready to marry you. In some cases this may be your husband. In other cases, its time to let him go. You need to find out who you are outside of him because everything that you have done up to this point has revolved around him. You see the clothes you wear as being ok not great. After all you bought these clothes when you were sixteen and they still fit. You can wear them another 2-3 years. Guys still view you the same way. At this age you view men differently which is the only change. Sophomore year also starts the process of weeding out or changing habits that you started in your freshman year. Your parents actually make sense. They know and understand more than you ever thought. You actually call them for advice instead of making mistake after mistake.
Towards the middle of your sophomore year which is the ages of 28-34 you want bigger and better things. It’s more than just a want; you actually go after it and get it. You are more determined at this age to live like your 30. The things that you bought ten years ago when you finally got your first real job is just not cutting it; and those things are falling apart and wearing out so you have to replace them anyways. Instead of furnishing your entire apartment with Target items – you only go there to buy certain things: socks, toilet paper, paper towels, DVD’s, etc.
The clothes you wear definitely change. You are trying to find a husband so looking like you just walked out of Forever 21 is not the look you are going for. The word “lady” actually means something to you. You view men differently mostly because you have been burned before so there are certain things you will absolutely not put up with. Your tolerance for nonsense and drama certainly is a bit higher – meaning you actually have a standard. Your biological clock starts ticking in this category. Marriage, kids, a house are things that you think about more often. A good percentage of your friends are married and have kids; you are just waiting for your turn. Clubs and bars – what are those? Why would I go to a place where half the people there have just turned 21 and the other half have fakes and snuck in. By the way your early 30’s is cleaning up the mess you made in your 20’s. Hopefully it won’t take the entire decade. You start thinking past the moment you are in. You realize there are consequences to your actions that can affect more than just yourself.
The end of sophomore year are ages 35-38. By this time you have met a really wonderful man. Not just anyone, your husband. Your "gut" tells you, "he is not like anyone else". You could have met Mr. Right in the 30-34 age range as well. The following still applies. This is mostly because you see the heart of the man and not just his six-pack stomach, his car, etc. You are guarded and cautious. You ask questions instead of sleeping with him by the 2nd or 3rd date. This is the age where men actually see you. They don't just see "she's hot." Don't get me wrong they see your body and how you look, but they want a relationship that's more fulfilling, so they work harder and try to get to know you. They actually are tired of the club seen and hopping from woman to woman. Their heart changes. Something tells them "don't let this one get away." As mind blowing as this sounds, that thought has never crossed their mind before. Everything is going great and you are ready for a ring. Don't pressure him. Let him propose when he is ready. You will know if he is the type of man that wants to get married (that conversation should've happened on the first or second date). Have realistic expectations of the relationship. Do not try to change him to suit you or your lifestyle. Don't rush out and get into a relationship just because you see all of your friends have gotten married. You will end up settling and the consequences of that are much farther reaching than you know. Learn the difference between submission and compromise - they are very different. Be patient with the transitional phases of your life. You will get there. Not to cut it short, there are many lessons to learn in sophomore year. Junior year is just around the corner and maybe harder than your 30’s. How will being in my 40's be any different than my 30's? Just wait and see..........
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